Lyrics
Heart of Coal
By Ian G. Clifton
April 6th, 2003
I'm so angry and so sad,
But who can I turn to? Who can I see?
I abandoned everyone,
Or maybe they abandoned me.
Punching the wall
Knuckles are bleeding red
I imagine everything you did
Everything you said
Why would I ever open my heart?
It only lets in pain
Why would I open my mouth?
I have nothing to explain
I am who I am
And I cannot be otherwise
I'd rather be true to myself
And be the one you despise
Cut me up,
Rip out my heart
I don't need it
While you tear me apart
I was alone
And that's what I'm used to
So now when you get close
I know just what to do
Turn everyone away
Stay in my cocoon
I'm not coming out
At least not soon
In here I can be me
I can cry and scream
I don't need reality
Because I can dream
I can avoid you
I don't have to see your eyes
I am sick of the games
Sick of the lies
It takes so much effort
To get outside
But every time I go
I wish I had died
I'd rather be a corpse
Hidden in my casket
Than be another apple
In your conformist basket
I don't need your games
I can make it on my own
So don't call me
I won't answer the phone
I'll never see you
At least not by choice
I don't want to talk
Because I'm sick of your voice
So I'll punch my wall
My knuckles will turn red
Bleeding all over
But I'm not dead
Pain is what I feel
But I have to make a choice
Would I rather be empty,
Or hear your voice?
I can feel sorrow
I can feel pain
But I don't see
What this makes me gain
So I'll be hidden
Behind my door
I might be empty
But I won't be hurt anymore